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Showing posts from 2012

I hate guns.

I hate guns.
And I am not afraid to say that. I'm really not big on pandering to gun owners. All of this malarkey about "hey I respect your right to own a gun" stuff isn't for me. I really don't. I've said I understand it. I tolerate it. But I just will not say I respect it.

Why are we so afraid to make guns a necessity rather than a status symbol? Soldiers need them. Cops need them. But personally, I'm neither and I see no purpose in my life for them. If I were afraid, and felt the need for protection, I might get a gun. And I'd hate it. I'd hate having to own one. I'd hate the fact that I was forced to live in a society that pushed me to that point. I'm hoping never to get there. I've gone over half a century without one. Never touched one. Never wanted to. There are those who do need them though. Victims of abuse certainly. Of course if society did more to protect them, maybe they wouldn't. Just the other night a young woman in …

Gun enthusiast or just plain crazy stupid?

When a neighborhood has a "drug" problem... we go after the drug dealers. Well our neighborhood, The USofA, has a gun problem, and we ought to go after the gun dealers. It's just that simple. Let's start talking about who sold the gun, who manufactured the gun, who made the bullets. Let's name names. Let's start shaming them into a new business. Since that's what it is. It's a business. And it kills.

Used to be cool to smoke. Sophisticated to smoke with a martini in your hand. And socially acceptable to do both, in someone else's living room... then drive home.

Do it now and you'll never be invited back.

Used to be exciting when there was a fight on the playground. Now it's grounds for expulsion.

Used to be ok to refuse to serve someone who might be different. Different color. Different body type. Differently abled. Now it's against the law.

So what changed? We did. We decided enough was enough and we as a society didn't want to ap…

lost moments

I was doing the ordinary today. Making a bowl of tuna salad. Carefully putting the exact amount of mayo. Exact amount of just right sized celery. Chopping and stirring to the perfect balanced texture. Exactly as my daughters like it. I thought about it because they come home from college in a few days so it was natural to think about how they always told me to make it. Truth is my younger daughter's been telling us what to do since she was knee-high. I know. We all know where this is going.

How many parents in Newtown are going to face these ordinary, mundane everyday tasks and suddenly realize the magnitude of what they will no longer have.

They won't have those moments. Many of us think in big terms. They won't see their child graduate. Get married. Have children. But it's the everyday that perhaps for me would be devastating.

If I no longer could use that litte tuna moment in my life to remind me how much I want to see my daughters home again. And I will. I am so in…

PUT DOWN YOUR F*G GUNS.

Enough Enough Enough. Seems like I was just here writing this last week. Oh wait I was. I thought I'd spent all the tears I had over this. Seems not. Seems our society just cannot seem to understand the value of a human life. The gun worship goes on, and the senseless slaughter continues.

I repeat myself here, I know. But yesterday I felt something I should never have felt more than once in a lifetime. That gut wrenching moment when you hear there's a gunman on a rampage, and your children may be in danger. It was as if I was right there with them. I knew what that felt like. I felt it the day a madman picked up a 9mm in Tucson and began his slaughter of the innocent.

Yesterday, too many parents had that moment. And for many it will never end. They didn't get the whoosh sigh of relief when their kids were back in their arms. They never will. I cried more tears yesterday than I have in a lifetime.

And then came the pundits.... this isn't the time to talk about gun cont…

Hands off my Happy Holidays!!!!

The following rant may offend some folks. Ooops. Sorry. But try taking it in the spirit in which it's written and you may just appreciate some of the irony. Maybe not.

Here it comes... last chance to stop reading.

Ok all you "It's Merry Christmas" not happy holidays people. Posting your signs on Facebook declaring it's CHRISTMAS. Or that you will express whatever greeting suits YOU. That's fine for you isn't it. Because it seems the holidays must be all about YOU. It isn't very generous of spirit now is it.

Nope, not so much.

Better think this through. CHANNUKAH STARTS TONIGHT.
So no, it's not Merry Christmas this week. Not even next week. Right now, we're going with Happy Holidays. Because we aren't exclusionary. And of course Channukah is followed quickly by the Winter Solstice (you know, the whole tree thing) and then Christmas which is quickly followed by Kwanzaa, then Mawlid-al-Nabi (Mohammad's birthday) in January as well. I don&…

Surround yourself with greatness

For me it's quite simple. Endorsements matter. The future of this country lies in the hands of one of two potential leaders. So. Who do they get their advice from? Who will they turn to? Who thinks they've got what it takes to lead us?

Things are scary. The economy is recovering, but it's fragile. That's true. So if I could gather some of the smartest people in the world in one place and ask for help.... who would that be. And who do they recommend, or endorse, to lead the way?

Well. Here's my most admired list when it comes to the economy.

Bill Gates. His business acumen and global perspective are unsurpassed and undeniable.
Warren Buffet. Again, who among you would challenge him in the corporate arena.
Bill Clinton. Face it, the guy knows how to move forward with globalization.
Mick Jagger. For those who are too young to realize it, he built a rock solid rock and roll empire based on talent... and a bit of education at the London School of Economics.

Coincidental…

Condoms. Boy Toys. By prescription only.

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Romney wants to change things from day 1. The hell with moving forward, let's move backwards instead. Planned Parenthood? Gone. Obamacare? Gone. Birth Control Access for all women? Gone.

Ok, turnabout is fairplay in this new alpha male world. So if an employer decides birth control is not in the best interests of an employee, will they also disallow the use of condoms by employees? After all, the money used to buy them will come out of their pay, so technically the company is buying them. Now we know that won't happen. But what if? Maybe we should make condoms by prescription only.
I mean really it's one thing to take access to birth control away from the women, who as we all know really shouldn't be making these decisions behind their mens' backs anyway... but what if we took access, and therefore the decisions, away from the men. The government should be making these decisions. Because Big Brother knows best. I know, you're thinking no no no, that would be so…

Oh. I've Offended you again?

With Hurricane Sandy leaving devastation and heartache in it's wake, I decided to repost this. It's just as true of course, but perhaps even more so. President Obama did what a true leader does. He was decisive. He was proactive. He got the wheels spinning even before the wind started churning. He put politics aside and took care of his nation as it suffered and for that alone I would vote for him. But, it's not just about disasters. It's about everyday. Therefore the repost.

It's election season, which for me means open season on supporters of my candidates' opponents. Ok. Whatever. Republicans. There I said it. OK? I am not happy with my republican friends. We used to have mild arguments over policy and solutions. Now it's not worth the effort.

They ask me how I can vote for Obama. Um... how can they vote for Romney? See, from where I sit, there's way too much at stake. Lives. Jobs. Our Economy. Our future. My daughters. My Mother. Hell, the truth is,…

Empty Nest or Cuckoo's Nest?

It was all anyone could say to us all summer. Oooooh. You'll be empty nesters. Like what, we've spent the last 21 years incubating eggs only to watch them hatch and fly away? Wishful thinking people.

It's 2012. Eggs don't hatch and fly away. They roll around for years with a slick coat of oil on them preventing you from getting a firm grip. Then they jump and soar and fly but like boomerangs always return.

Back to the here and now. Young one is 18 and off to college far far away. Following in older one's footsteps, if you are going to leave the nest, go far and wide but latch some sort of financial rope to your parents' ankles so you don't wither and perish.

So here we are, hubby and me, after 25 years of marital bliss, or at least negotiated peace... to fend for ourselves in our humble abode. Turns out he likes to talk and sing alot. No really. A LOT. I feel like I've entered sitcom land. He's gone from quiet, meek, obedient husband to some sort of…

Be a force for change. Bring on Betty.

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Bring Betty to the DNC. If anyone gets to spotlight the wisdom of the ages... let it be us. Let's not leave the world with the lasting impression that our elders are so poorly cared for they've gone insane.

Let's show the world our best and brightest.

Just sign the petition. Act Now.

Vist the page. Share the joy.

Oh wait there's more:

On McCain and Palin

Birther Birthday

At the White's House (start at 1:10)

Entitlements. The truth and the heart of the election.

A lot of readers may get very angry at what I am about to discuss. Others will be confused by my ramblings. Mostly I think people will have the uncomfortable feeling that I'm right and I shouldn't be and it mustn't be true but is.

So here it is. Republicans believe entitlements are a scurge on our economy. A detriment to our work ethic. A budget-busting frivolity and a deficit-boosting evil.

A republican will say that entitlements drag us all down. They don't inspire us. They drain us as a society. They diminish the incentive to work hard and prosper. We must reduce, if not eliminate them for our Nation to once again rise to the top.



But for me entitlements are far more insidious in the Republican universe. And there's one entitlement they aren't discussing. The elephant in the room if you will. The entitlement that lies at the very heart of the anti-Obama sentiment. That pure, unadulterated hatred that we see across our nation for a man who clearly, by all the…

Romney-Ryan are just a couple of regular guys...

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Let's face it. Romney and Ryan are a picture perfect team to try and take back America. Because they look just like the face of America. Well.. in their eyes.

What do they see in the mirror? Prosperous. Healthy. Successful. Heterosexual. Male. White. Pearly White Teeth. Blemish free. The American dream personified. What do they see at their fundraising events?

Oh wait. That's not all of America. They'll need more votes than that won't they. They need to court regular folks to win the White House now. Hmmm. How to fix that.

I know. They can play "let's pretend". Just like those fools at the free rallies waving flags and singing songs of God and Country. They're pretending to be just like Romney and Ryan. Except they probably don't have pearly white teeth. And their necks are a bit redder without those starched white collars. And don't you love the outfits. Romney gets the tie... Ryan gets the jacket. But neither wears both because then they cou…

Here we are again. Heartbroken.

Guns don't kill, people do. Know what I think? I think that statement makes me physically ill. People kill people with guns. People will kill people with other weapons given the opportunity. Just easier with an assault rifle. More importantly, why are we excusing it?

Why are we making weapons to sell to civilians on the open market? Why are we making weapons at all? Why the hell do we live in a society that fights evil with evil? Why do we make movies that glorify mass violence?

When life imitates art, we blame individuals. We don't stop and ask ourselves why our art is so violent or disturbing. Nope. We fall back on freedom of expression. Violence sells.Violence is good for the economy.

I haven't listened to the 911 calls. I can say with certainty it would be far too disturbing for me. You can if you wish here, but please this is not for children or anyone with a speck of humanity in them: Shooting in Aurora 911 tapes

Ask a gun seller. He'll tell you he's just mak…

And the average age of the GOP? 2.6

Nope. That's not how long they've been politicians. It's based on their own vow to be the party of no. As any parent will tell you, the average age for this kind of behavior is 2.6. Though really it never goes away entirely. But if we're good at our jobs, our children grow and mature and use the word only when necessary. Not just because.

Back to the GOP. Which stands for Grand Old Party. Wait! Old? Huh. Coulda fooled me.

Ask any 2 year old. Want to play outside? No. Want to play inside? No. Want to play? No. Want to nap? No. Want to eat? No. Want to do anything at all? No. Wanna do nothing? No. Hmmm. And so the frustration begins.

From the time they don't want to wake up in the morning until the time they don't want to go to bed at night, your average toddler will say NO more than 150 times. Just like our GOP elected officials.

Why? Well let's see... hmmm... what could it be now?


The single most important thing we want to achieve is for President Obama to b…

In case you missed it...

For those who came looking for my vacation hell blog, due to my sister's concerns for my well-being and her inability to believe that anyone could be so ridiculously ignorant that they couldn't find my blog if it were printed on the front page of the newspaper they can't read... I unpublished the piece. It is still available by request. Just drop me a line and I'll be happy to email you a copy.

Suffice to say some vacations just turn out badly. As did this one. But when you turn the TV on one day and find a trailer for "Meet me in Nantucket" do me a favor and buy that ticket. You'll be glad you did.

Vacation hell...and back

For our 25th anniversary I planned a fabulous week in new England the highlight of which would be sitting under the starlit night sky of Nantucket on the 4th of July. On a budget. My daughters love to remind me "you get what you pay for!" And so we did.
You think Nantucket will be oh so Rockwellesque... instead you get Stepfordesque on Steroids.
Our hostess it seems was having a bad week. Joan Crawford has risen.
I imagine that's what happens when you come from a successful group of siblings and do nothing but mooch and freeload. And she's the queen at freeloading. Thus the summerhouse on Nantucket she ended up with.
Author's note: Having written this in an emotional hurricane, I begin with apologies to anyone who might take offense. Get over it.

I tried to be a good guest. I followed the appropriately grateful protocol.

On My Best Behavior "Don't worry about me... all I need in the morning is a good cup of coffee and a beach."
"Is instant ok?&quo…

Since when is it a crime to care

Every time someone sneers as they say "Obamacare" they show just how ignorant a human being can be. Growing up never facing adversity does not entitle you to belittle someone else's trials and tribulations. And not READING the legislation, well, it's unforgiveable if you are going to criticize it.

Listen carefully to Mitt Romney when he says "up to 20 million people could lose their existing benefits." Translated, that could mean that nobody loses anything. It could mean one or one hundred will lose their current health insurance when it's replaced with another. It's misleading at best. Add to that the shot of him in front of the White House... well... very very far in front... and quite a few more interesting statements that don't mean a damn thing...hell why use facts when you have far more creative things to say...
Mitt Romney's ridiculous speech

Point is, the only people who will truly suffer under Obamacare are those who don't care a…

Why Facebook is worth billions

If you measure a company's worth by its worth to society, here's why FB is worth Billions:






And there you have it. Go forth and buy your shares.

10 stages of facebook

Facebook is an amazing phenomenon. Not because 800 gazillion people are using it. But because it provides a window in the soul of every relationship you've ever had with anyone and absolutely reflects how you live your life.

It begins so simply. Your friend, neighbor, classmate, relative, mom, son, daughter, plumber, butcher says "WHAAT? You're not on facebook? Let's get you signed up!
And your journey begins.

Stage 1. Time Travel
OMG it's that kid behind me from 3rd grade. Must confirm. So excited.... 21 friends! This is so fun!

Stage 2. Getting to know you
I can't believe it's been 40 years. OK. 45. How ARE you? Married? Kids? Job? Remember Tony? Dick? Jane? OMG this is soooo great!

Stage 3. Learning to Creep
Wow. That profile picture is like 10 years old. Maybe I'll check out the other photos. Oh. Timeline. Hey... is that Sheila with Tony? what year is that? 1978? wait a minute. I was dating Tony.... oh well. water under the bridge. wow. those kids are…

My Mayan Bucket List

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Since according to the Mayan Calendar, this is pretty much it, I've started on my bucket list. It isn't your usual bucket list. It's really more of a seize the moment kind of deal.

As a lifelong procrastinator, I've decided to finally change my ways. Not all at once mind you. And maybe not today, or even tomorrow... but sooner rather than later.

So what have I done thus far during this year of the cataclysmic event?

Well, I finally purchased a new phone. Well, the old one died, but still, I bought a new one with new gadgets that I actually intend to figure out how to use. I'd been investigating this potential purchase for a while. Asking the experts and those who just think they are. Got no consensus at all so I went with Maxxie, short for Maxine. Yep. The cartoon character. Says it all. And I'd certainly put Maxxie up against Siri any day. One night I got up to turn the ringer off at 3am. The next morning, there was a message from Maxxie. Did I want her to aut…

25 Years of fun and adventure.

So in honor of our 25th Anniversary, I am reposting my thoughts about marriage. The whole idea of choosing to spend your life with someone, for as long as you are lucky enough to have them, then actually doing it is fairly daunting. And a lot of people just don't seem to be able to manage it. Sometimes it takes more than one attempt. Sometimes fate intervenes, or it just wasn't the right time or, right person.

When I look around, at my closest friends, we've all managed this enormous accomplishment. In different ways I think, but there are some common threads, not the least of which is no cheating. Simple really. Not because Monogamy is essential to a good marriage. But because Trust is. And cheating, by it's very nature, is a betrayal of trust. So don't even go there.

That said, here are a few of my rules for a bumpy but exceedingly worthwhile and often entertaining adventure. Marriage according to Mary. With a caveat.... I don't always manage to follow my ow…

Facebook vs Google+

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I know all the pundits have their sophisticated views on which is better. 
Facebook or Google+? 


Facebook Status: 
Prudence and 3 other friends are at Walmart.


Google + Post:
Hubble Captures View of 'Mystic Mountain' 




Facebook Status: 
Susie P: wonders how much more of this new powerfood diet she can stomach.


Google + Post: 
Get "It's Only Rock N Roll" free :http://goo.gl/M1Por 


Facebook Status: 
HipHopJanie: is ready to pahhhhtaaaay!


Google + Post: 
Watch the story of a 12-year-old girl named Molly as she records daily life in the Mathare Slum, Nairobi. Molly's New Shoes


Clearly there is no comparison.

Happy Peastover

My daughter calls it Peaster. I prefer Peastover. Or, Peacedover. So much goodwill floating around. We live in a confused house. We have no formal religion, only traditions. We'll eat Matzoh and hunt for eggs. We'll light candles and decorate a tree. Not with the lit candles though. That's strictly for those with lots of faith.

We don't do the whole atonement thing. That requires faith too. That there's some greater being who has the power to forgive your merely mortal human failings. I'd rather just stay merely mortal with human failings and make no apologies to anyone.

My favorite atonement story. I decided sophomore year of college to head over to "services" at Hillel with some friends on Yom Kippur. I dressed up, put on my "most respectful" face and lasted maybe 20 minutes before sneaking out. But I felt good about it. I had no idea what they were talking about, or sermonizing about... but I'd made an effort. Good for me, where's…

Red is the new Blue

I've been wearing the same damn blue clothes for years. T-shirts. Sweatshirts. Jackets. I look good in Blue. It fits. I feel smarter in Blue. However, it's time to brighten my wardrobe and my outlook, with Red. Why Red?

1. Red is a Rich, Loud color. And that gives me the look of the Rich and Loud.
2. I'm tired of blending in and just being one of many. I want to rise to to the top and set myself apart. I could try a new hairdo... like The Donald, but it wouldn't look good.
3. Red is a fabulous color. It just screams LOOK AT ME. It's Royal. It's top of the line. And, thus, I will be too.
4. It's a sign of being pure-blooded. No funny stuff inside. Primary color if you will. Untainted by logic or reason. Unsullied by empathy or even a conscience.
5. Financially it's an oxymoron. For those of us who wear blue, being in the red is not typically a good thing. Unless of course you are a Red. Like the Donald. Or a Bolshevik. Again the old oxymoron rears its he…

6,000 college choices. Who's #1? Your kid.

When you finally come down to, it helping your child choose a college is about helping them discover themselves. And letting go. It's about stepping back and watching them determine their own future. And stepping forward to give them a head start. After completing this rite of passage twice now, I figure it's time to share some pearls of wisdom.


Our children are unique, interesting people who deserve a perfect fit. And there is one out there. But here's the catch. You have to really look. Hard. And toss your stereotypes out the window. 


Your new mantra must be "it's their life not mine."


So here are my simple rules for picking the right fit. 

1. Selectivity is nothing more than overrated competition.We're all subject to the competitive nature of college admissions. We're all somewhat inclined to live vicariously through our children. And we all have a tendency to want those bragging rights when a child achieves the near impossible by gaining admission to …