psychic or psychotic

I have this fascination with psychics. Mentalists. Mediums. I have no idea why it is, but for someone who is pretty much on the disbelieving side of religion, and a self-proclaimed UFO skeptic, it's a bit strange. I have an insatiable appetite for watching them practice their craft. I want to know. Is it real? Mental tricks? good guesswork? Can they possibly know that the girl in the front row's Aunt's ring fell out of the box and down the toilet when she was 4 and she's been carrying this dark secret all her life? Is there any possible way that the medium on the talk show can know that the guy in the third row picks his nose in the car?

Well, yes. Of course he can. He probably was stopped at the red light next to him before the show. Or his assistant was. As for that ring down the drain...no way. Well, I'm sure there is a way. Just don't know how it's done. But somewhere deep inside I so want it to be real. I do. I want to think my Great Uncle Dave is off tickling the ivory with a group of friends standing around the upright piano singing along. That my beloved grandmother is off on the other side, in her favorite chair, nodding her head, smiling, and telling me to run along and have fun. She used to do that before my friends and I went out on the town. That my dad is in a great big skybox conference room pounding his fist on a table and proclaiming everyone else in the room is an idiot. Thing is, they probably are. My dad was a pretty smart guy.

Lots of research has been done, and continues to be done, into whether religious people are more inclined to believe in the paranormal, UFO's, spirits...then us more practical atheistical types. With no clear cut answers. Though it appears they are generally averse to anything that smacks of supernatural stuff. But i have a theory. If you are super religious, and have a grounded belief in God, then you probably also believe that God has a plan. And if someone dies, it's part of that plan and now they are in heaven with God and everything is wonderful and you'll see them sometime, hopefully not too soon.

But since that's not my thing, I have this burning need to know. Where do we go? what happens? Am I married till death do us part, or even in the hereafter?  Cause I was kind of thinking we got a do-over. I'd have my 20 year old body. No wait. that wasn't a good year. My 25 year old body. Then again, my husband would too. not mine...his. And so maybe we could start all over again? That could be fun. I dunno, though, eternity? That's a long time. Maybe that's why those non-believers in the psychic realm are so adamant about the life cycle. They want that do-over. The hell with eternity. In any case I just have to know. Are there really people who talk to the dead? Or are they just people with voices in their heads. My practical side thinks, yeah, a tad schizophrenic. My hyper imaginative side thinks, way cool, can you put me through to Abe Lincoln?

I know I'm a fairly intelligent, practical person who doesn't believe every thing I see or hear, but I just really really want it to be true. I don't care about bigfoot or Yedi or Nessie. I don't care about flying saucers. But John Edward? Sylvia Brown? I really want them to be on the up and up. I know they are really good at their craft. Just not sure whether their craft is a hustle, or the real McCoy. They are wrong half the time. Which means half the time they are right. And you can't prove they aren't psychic. But you can't prove they are.
Alleged Psychic; "I'm feeling the letter r...r....no... rs.....something ending in rs....like razors....no wait...painters.....hold on...papers. Yes. Papers. Did somebody have something with missing papers. Wait...there's a crinkling sound....possibly crackling.
Audience member: "Yes yes! Oh my God. Missing papers...that's me...Oh my God! They cremated my great Uncles 5th wife and she had the deed to the house in her pocket! Oh my God how did you know that!

Yep. The whole thing is fascinating to me. And I guess until I'm convinced by one myself, I'm gonna have to call this one a stalemate. But if any of you out there are genuine, honest-to-goodness psychics, and can tell me where that box of ticket stubs went to...I'll be a permanent believer.

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