I don't mean to offend anyone, but...

Sure. I could be wrong. The End could actually be nigh. May 21st. That's the big day.
Like in 2000. Oh wait. We're still here.
Or in 1000. Or 1033. Maybe it was 1853.
Or the 1970's. I remember all those wild eyed folks on the street corners of New York City with their signs, calling out as we walked by that our days were numbered. Bad enough we were teenagers, breaking rules anyway, so calling us out like that and telling us we were going to die was just a bit creepy.
And then there were the "88 signs the Rapture will be in 1988?"

So, here's my take on the whole enchilada. Some people consider themselves very very pious. In fact, it seems as if religion is their whole raison d'etre. And so, following this logic, the fact that with all of society's laws and mores and prisons and wars and torture and threats and blackmail and sin upon sin in the name of controlling said sin, for some damn reason the fundamentalist churches of the world cannot seem to control their flocks. Like a parent of a toddler. Frustrated beyond belief.

Thus, they bring us the Rapture. Time and again. The ultimate ultimatum. Behave now. Follow God now. Do as you must or you will not come to heaven with us. When you strip it down, who does this sound like? That's right. All you need are a few virgins waiting happily for you and you see a pattern here don't you?

Well hmm, maybe I don't want to hang out with them for eternity. Maybe I don't like them. There. I said it. I don't like everyone. I don't like bullies. And this definitely qualifies as bullying. I don't like being told what I must believe. Don't like thought police. I respect their right to think that they are somehow going to be zapped up to heaven. Their choice. But visually it really invokes images of Ancient Aliens, that fabulously provocative series on the history channel. God was an alien. Gods were aliens. We are technically aliens. Somehow that's just a far more interesting scenario. And completely explains next years Dec 21st deadline from the Mayans. Some believe they just didn't bother to start a new calendar cycle when the first one ended. Others believe they were all-knowing and wise. And yet they did have an early demise. Their civilization actually didn't make it all the way to 2012. Though they do have descendants and perhaps they will all be gone by 2012. Or maybe, just maybe, they were in fact Aliens. And next year, on December 21, the mother ship will return. Do you think the Rapturites will still be camping out on the mountaintop?

So I don't worry about The End. Don't need to. If I perish with everyone else, I'm not worried about burning for eternity. I have lived a pretty decent life. I believe. I do. I believe I'm a damn good person. Just what their God intended. Maybe mine. Not sure if I have one. There are so many to choose from, it's hard to decide. I do have a deep rooted belief that their are powers in the universe I can't explain. And not because I only lasted 3 days in physics. But because I think our world is an astounding place. And humanity just a microscopic piece of it. I've always thought of God as Mother Nature. Obviously female. Sorry. But the power of the Wind, the Water, the Planets... all providing us what we need to exist. Pretty strong argument there. And, if true, we should be more respectful of our planet and our resources and look for ways to avoid The End by protecting and cherishing what these wonderful entities collectively known as God have given us. For me, standing on the mountaintop waiting to be beamed up instead of working to avoid such a catastrophe is just plain freaking lazy.

But back to choices. Over the last few million years we've seen many many ideas of God presented. All depicted waving their arms, scepters, swords and bags of treasures commanding us to "PICK ME! NO PICK ME! Like purses. All lined up as you enter the store virtually screaming at you to buy them. I have a thing for purses. Not shoes. I'd go barefoot everywhere if I could. Jesus did. You think he really wore leather sandals like in the pictures? And no, I don't have leather purses either. Simulated leather. Cheaper that way. Save a buck. Yes, pun intended.

Back to May 21st. I plan on being around on the 22nd. And the 23rd. It's my brother's birthday after all and I'm pretty sure he'll want to be around for that as well. But, if in fact all goes as planned for the Rapturites, in my view they'll be a lot fewer crazies for us to deal with and subsequently, life may actually become more of a heaven on earth.

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