so many friends, so little time

I think there should be a Facebook rule. Friend the people you know, and Unfriend those you don't.

If you can't offer up one personal detail about someone in your FB circle of friends, they aren't a friend. Unfriend them. Now. No one has 697 friends. Or should.

You need to review your list, one by one. For each, think of one relatively unknown, personal, preferably embarassing detail about that person without looking anything up. If nothing comes to mind, unfriend them. Please, people, get a grip. You don't need to have everyone on your page. It's absolutely idiotic.

I'm not saying unfriend the people you know. I'm saying unfriend the people you don't. Technically, a friend is someone you know. Nuf said.

I have exactly 100 friends on Facebook. Ok, let's subtract members of my egregiously large family. They can all be on your list and don't count in the "too many friends" category. They're family. They don't have to be friends. But I can without a doubt say something interesting about the remaining members of my list. Really.

Some of them I've known since I was 2 feet tall. Since I haven't grown much, that's not really saying much. But, let's just say half are old friends, half are just old. real names here. Here are some of the friend possibilities I've had.
Let's take Marco. When he was a kid he used to trip over his shoelaces. Even when wearing sandals. FRIEND.
Then there's Melanie. She actually tried to sleep with a once-upon-a-time love interest of mine. Don't know if she succeeded, but if so, he deserved whatever he caught. FRIEND.

Timothy dumped me like a sack of potatoes in college. Trust me, looking back it's a good thing. FRIEND.
There's Jack, who in 6th grade didn't recognize me and tried to flirt with me. We'd known each other since kindergarten. Idiot. FRIEND.

Wow. You wonder, why friend them on facebook? Well, I don't friend them all.
Take Chris, the kid who used to chase me around the playground and pull my hair. IGNORE. He's probably a stalker today.
And Tiffany, the girl who barely gave me the time of day in high school. IGNORE. I hear she and her 10th husband fled the country after the last crash.

Come on! We're all guilty. We want to be sure we are younger looking, better off and happier than they are. Fair enough. I'm game. But what about the rest of all those friends you might have. Do you have any idea who they are?

If someone friends you, do you just shrug and say what the hell? He looks harmless. Ted Bundy looked harmless. And noone even knows what Jack the Ripper looked like. Chances are, most people don't post profile photos holding their own personal Chainsaw.

Facebook is a good thing. But let's all take a reality check. Resist the temptation to always hit Confirm. Suck it up. Just say no. Hit the IGNORE button just once. Really. It'll be the feel-good moment of your day.

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